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It is an honor to have you. The contents for this blog are from my personal experiences. Sometimes I will write about being bipolar and sometimes I won't.


Friday, September 27, 2013

Mental Illness in Plain View

“Mental illness pierces the veil,” she writes at the end of her book, “and those who suffer from it dwell with their fragility in plain view.”  Dr. Montross

RANT STARTS Being Mentally ill (I am Bipolar yay!) is a big fucking problem. We lose jobs due to missed days because of our chronic and lifelong conditions. It is hard for others to sympathize with us because there are no physical symptoms to prove "Hey I have voices in my head". People just have to take our word on it. And sometimes I feel like my word is worthless to those unafflicted. 

I honestly believe that some think we are weak and lazy and over/under weight due to choice. Well, you can all kiss my crazy ass! It is way more than that. Our medicines make us groggy, our moods make us unpredictable (oh does that sound like fun! Try going out on a family outing when your panic attack hits you because everyone is wearing a mask due to it being Halloween, and your 5 and 6 year old nieces see you have the panic attack. Such fun) So yes we stay in safe places and don't always enjoy being in a grocery store or at a concert. 


But there is hope....I have to believe that. 

Anybody relate to this rant of mine. I know you can so go ahead and get the frustration out. 

I won't judge no matter what your illness. 

I am calm now....RANT OVER NOW 

"
Of all the afflictions that fall upon us, few remain as misunderstood and stigmatized as those that affect the mind." Dr. Christine Montross

The problem is that the mentally ill already have to struggle everyday to try and act like we are not ill. We take our little pills, pay the good Doctors, try to keep our agitation to a minimum, and then we still have to do the every day things such as eat, sleep, bathe, answer a phone call, clean our living space, budget our money, and try to keep our relationships with family and friends in tact.  

All this can be overwhelming. I mean just picture yourself not answering your phone because you're at a loss for conversation. Oh that is typical....I know everyone gets that way sometimes but the mentally ill may not answer for a week. Then the electric gets cut off because you missed the disconnect warning call since you're not even listening to your voicemails....no electricity. That happens to everyone but not when they have the money to pay the bill in the account. It is not laziness holding us back. Oh we are very stimulated and stimulating people but even with meds we are not well. We manage better but wellness feels like it can never be obtained. Or maybe it is just me. I have been doing okay but lately I am very ....overwhelmed. Oy

I guess Overwhelm is the key word today



2 comments:

  1. Oh hun, I feel your frustration. I am finally in the process of seeing a new doctor that will hopefully be human and not mechanical. The "normals" never understand, and they never will. We will always seem weak to them. The funny thing is though, we are stronger than they could ever hope to be because we get through things every day that would drive them straight to death's door pounding on it begging for relief. Everyone of us is different from the other. Most days I refuse to see myself as different, or tainted in some way. We are special, because we are stronger than the average Joe simply due to the fact that we suffer the way we do and we are still here to talk about it!

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    Replies
    1. I do agree. But I do believe that I was feeling a bit of hypomanic agitation. I wish I was a normal. It is draining being on a mood bing. I feel like i was throwing up anger and it is tiring to reread.

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